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Bart's Bash at Olton Mere Sailing Club

by Charlie Chandler 25 Sep 2014 18:41 BST 21 September 2014
Bart's Bash race at Olton Mere © Charlie Chandler

Who is the greatest superhero or villain ever?

There has long been the question, who is the greatest ever superhero or villain?. Many comic books have tried to settle this but have not agreed on a conclusion. Olton Mere Sailing Club decided to mark Bart's Bash with a battle of superheroes and villains to answer this question once and for all!

51 boats took to the water to celebrate the life of Andrew 'Bart' Simpson and the sport of sailing - plus to solve this age old question.

The wind played ball blowing straight down the lake, allowing a start line to be set the full width of the lake. Even so this still produced starting conditions similar to those found at the Lord Birkett. But with a James May and some bloke pretending to be from the RNLI on rescue cover, the scene was set!

Batman and Robin paused on the way out to the start line for a quick fag from their utility belts. This allowed the rest of the fleet a swift get away while Batman and Robin started from the rear, once again highlighting the problems of smoking.

After a nifty start at the committee boat end of the start line Spider-Man used his spider senses to lead by about 50m at the windward mark chased by Capt'n Pugwash.

The wind filled in from behind on the third leg allowing the Crazy Monkey to sail around both Capt'n Pugwash and Spider-Man. Luke Skywalker hoped to capitalise as the wind filled in from behind but was unable to navigate his Laser around everyone and instead was sucked back into the pack, possibly by some Death Star weapon.

The second beat resulted in a close taking battle between the Crazy Monkey and Spider-Man. The Crazy Monkey played his cards best to slip away, never to be seen again.

Further down the fleet there was a tight battle between an array of characters ranging from pirates to clowns. A couple of members were dressed as divers, who maybe were expecting more wind? 'Dennis the Menace' brought his Solo out for the day and highlighted that fuzzy hair is the best protection for a low boom! Batman and Robin went well after their slow start but Robin was heard to cry a bit as he tore his favourite green tights on the top of the centreboard on the Bat Boat...

Other notable performances were Team 118 118 who did a fantastic job to be first National 12 home and George Sunderland who was first youth sailor ahead of 'Army Chick' Pru Dixey.

One of the best sights of the day was the stealth Solo 'Das Old Boot', which having not been used for a couple of years had plant growth most of the way up the mast and all the way up the shrouds. 'Das Old Boot' stalked round the course in stealth mode but was unable to sink anyone.

The event was fantastic fun and was followed by a cracking BBQ allowing the club members to enjoy the fine summer evening and to share their experiences of the race, including the challenges faced when wearing only a thin lycra suit or a cape in a dinghy!

Thanks go to those who helped run the day both on the shore and on the water, without whom this event would not have been the success that it was.

So in conclusion to this epic story, the greatest character ever: the Crazy Monkey...

Overall Results:

1st Crazy Monkey (Tom White) – Laser
2nd Spider Man (Charlie Chandler) – OK
3rd Mr Boring (Rob Yearsley) – Laser
4th Bike Man (Steve Jellicoe) – Laser
5th Capt'n Pugwash (Andrew Dixey) – Laser
6th The Hippy (Phil Didley) – Solo
7th Bat Man and Robin (Matt French and Steve Taylor) – RS Vision
8th George Sunderland – RS Tera
9th Luke Skywalker (Simon Coles) – Laser
10th Kathy Hall

1st Youth: George Sunderland

Best Outfit: Michael Roberts

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